Alone In Defeat

For those of you who don’t know, over the last 11 months, I have become extremely involved in my local VFW. It is an orginization that I feel very passionate about and believe in. I also know that it is hurting for members. The biggest issue with any Veteran orginztion is that it is led by the “old men” (meaning Vietnam/Korean Vets). 11 months ago, I set out to change that.

2 months ago, I was approached by a group of people that wanted me to take over as Sr. Vice Commander. This person is 2nd in charge of the Post but his/her main responsability is bringing in new members. It wasn’t a knock on the current SVC but this is the reason I made the decision the become more active. The VFW needed more Iraq/Afgan Veterans to be more active in this orginization. I am the youngest (active) memeber and the roll fit perfectly. I gladly accepted.

Tonight was election night. I thought that the group that approached me had “stacked” the room in my favor and some good changes could be made. I lost the by majority vote. It was also the only position that needed a “ballot” to vote for.

I am crushed.

The only thing that makes this loss hurt more is I have no one to “share” it with. The one person I wanted to call/talk to about this doesn’t want to be close to me. The one person I want to cry to about having to wait (at least) another year doesn’t want to have anything to do with me.

I feel so alone right now. I feel like I have no one anymore. I feel like even if I had won, I would feel the same way because I would. This moment in my life means nothing because I don’t have the a person to share it with and that hurts the most.

I guess I’ll have to learn to accept that this is the way it is and find a way to deal with these situations by myself. This is not the way I invisioned this to happen in my life.

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5 thoughts on “Alone In Defeat

  1. Maria says:

    Rocco, I’m so sorry to hear that you lost the vote but you’ve gained so much during the last 11 months. Not long until you win the vote. You’re already part of a big change that you’ve encouraged, don’t underestimate that.
    I’m sorry that your wife isn’t there for you. I know it’s not the same but I’m sure many others are there for you. I’m here for you and I think you’re an awesome guy with so much to offer. Sometimes life takes from us the things that hold us back. It’s a perspective that I’ve had to embrace in order to move forwards in my life and find the true meaning of where I belong and what I need to do. At first everything seems so chaotic and exhausting but in time all that changes as we adapt to the new world that we find ourselves in. I hope you’ll continue graciously in your journey and don’t accept defeat because it’s a road that’s taking you somewhere where things will be just right for you.
    Big hug my friend.

    • Thank you so much Maria. You are a good friend and you know just what to say. I really appreciate you being here for me.

      • Maria says:

        You’re welcome rocco. I hope I have helped you with a positive perspective and one that can get you through these dark times. I’m praying for you my friend and I sincerely mean that.

  2. erenn87 says:

    You are never alone, dear. You can get a hold of me at anytime.

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